Purva and Ashok were absolutely in love. They were caught up in their romance for the two years they were dating and after Ashok proposed, they became consumed with wedding planning. This left little to no time for either of them to talk about the important issues such as finances, children and their future lifestyle once the grand wedding was over.
After they returned from their honeymoon, Purva and Ashok became busy with daily life. More →
Tagged: communication, expectations, family, healthy relationships, men's issues, relationships, story, women's issues
December 5, 2011 · 1 Comment
South Asians who wish to choose their own partners are changing generations-long tradition of arranged marriages. While this change is slowly being accepted by the South Asian culture, difficulties still persist. Even if the parents are open to talking about dating, young South Asians can rarely rely on their parents for advice on how to find their perfect partner since most often their parents never dated each other. More →
Tagged: dating, expectations, men's issues, relationships, repeated patterns, self-reflection, tips, women's issues
Shefali, a housewife and mother of 2 children under the age of 5, looked like a deer in headlights. Her mind was racing, she couldn’t catch her breath and she wanted to cry but felt she had no time to do so. She knew she had a hundred things to do that day but as she tried to list each one out, her mind went into ten other directions at the same time. Her eyes darted about as she jumped from one task to another, never fully completing any of them. More →
Tagged: anxiety, anxiety disorder, children, emotions, expectations, fatigue, insomnia, irritability, laughter, men's issues, mood, stress, teens, tips, women's issue
With Valentine’s Day around the corner, relationships are on many people’s minds. Valentine’s Day is also a popular day for engagements and celebrating taking the relationship to a different level. Whether it’s because of Bollywood movies, fairy tales we grow up hearing or just plain hope, we tend to believe that getting married will make life simpler and easier, that any differences we have as a couple prior to marriage will resolve themselves once we’re legally committed to one another. In addition, young South Asian couples have a tendency to assume that if their partner is also from the same culture, they must share the same values and vision for a future life together. More →
Tagged: communication, counseling/therapy, dating, expectations, family, healthy relationships, men's issues, relationships, tips, women's issues
A unique issue for first-generation American-born South Asians is that many prefer the Western method to finding your life partner: dating. Since many of their parents are immigrants and probably had arranged marriages, they aren’t able to turn to their parents for help on learning how to navigate the dating scene.
As they embark on the journey of finding a significant other, a common concern South Asians who are dating have is why they end up dating the same type of person repeatedly. Interestingly, the answer to this relies mainly on self-reflection, as who you choose to date is often based on patterns that you have learned in childhood and adolescence. For example: More →
Tagged: arguments, communication, dating, expectations, men's issues, relationships, repeated patterns, self-reflection, women's issues
Self-reflection is key to understanding the deeper issues that exist within a relationship. For example, why does it bother you every time she leaves her house slippers in the middle of the hallway? Or how come when you feel sad, you express it as anger? Understanding the role and influence of our family or origin helps us to know more about why we became who we are. However, there is a strong connection between how a family treats you and the expectations you grow up with about the world and other people in your life, called the internal working model. More →
Tagged: arguments, children, communication, expectations, family, self-reflection